Too much time on my hands

Robert Roe -

Vacation. The act of vacating. Getting out. I had a vacation this week, taking a rest from my normal work-a-day routine. How did it go? First, the prep:

Last week I began OCD proofing everything at home so I would not spend my entire off week obsessing over a shirt not facing the proper direction (right, sorted by color) or a book improperly shelved (by subject, then alphabetical by author).

Next I tried to squeeze ten pounds of activities into a five pound bag. Multi-tasking at work is nothing compared to what I try to shoehorn into my time off.

Reading. Writing. Arithmatic. Just kidding. Math. Seriously? No math. But I am planning on reading a lot. The list includes “Mastering Logical Fallacies” by Michael Withey, “British English From A To Zed” from Norman W. Schur and John Gribben’s “In Search Of Schrodinger’s Cat.” A good start to a relaxing week.

Of course, I have some model kits to build. My current project is a Hurdy-Gurdy. If a harpsichord and a Peanut Grinder’s organ had a child, it would be this musical instrument. What could possibly side-line my perfectly planned past-time? In a word, Me.

A Sunday Movie Marathon kept me from activities on the Vacation to-do list. “The Dark Tower (not bad),” “Murder On The Orient Express (I miss David Suchet as Hercule Poirot),” “Jumanji (Fun Fun Fun),” and “American Made (the best parts of the movie are in the trailer).” So Sunday wasn’t very productive. There’s always Monday.

Did you know there are TV marathons on Mondays about people being creeped out of their Haunted Houses? There is! And, that’s what I spent Monday watching. No worries. I’ll start on my vacation list tomorrow.

Huh. The Haunted House marathon runs all day Tuesday, as well. Do you know how much people put up with from ghosts before they take action? Unfortunately, now I do. They put up with a lot. Sigh. Tomorrow is another day. Hopefully a more productive day.

Short digression here. A while ago my Bride and I got hooked on a TV show called “Mountain Monsters.” In it, a sextet of Good Ole Boys hunt monsters. In the mountains. Hence the name of the show.

Over the course of an episode the team chases and tries to trap creatures like the Snallygaster, the Wampus Beast, the Midnight Whistler and the Kentucky Hellhound (keep your Mother-In-Law jokes to yourself). Imagine any of the Real Housewives shows, except with the cast wearing bandannas and bib overalls. The show was not good in any way, shape or form. But we couldn’t look away.

Which brings me to Wednesday. I found a marathon of “Alaskan Monsters” which, coincidentally, featured a sextet of Good Ole Boys hunting monsters. In Alaska. Hence the name of the show. And another wasted day.

Thursday morning. Filing this from the land of the Best Laid Plans. Books read: ten pages of Elmore Leonard. Not even on my list! Zero Models completed. Binge watched junk television a lot. Relaxation? Don’t ask.

I have three days to go, with no illusions of being productive during that time. Face it – my Getaway got away. This weekend’s planned outing has been cancelled due to the unexpected threat of several inches of “Global Warming.” Not conducive to outdoor activities, which I engage in from time to time. With proper sun protection, of course.

Oh, well. Maybe if I start planning now, I’ll devise the perfect vacation relaxation for next time. First, my reading list…

Robert Roe Roe