The Christmas season has always held a special place in my heart. For the most part I believe that people show more kindness, that they seem to be more thoughtful and appear to be joyful. It’s a time that families gather together and share the one gift we seem to have so little of, time. I’ve been thinking about time more and more recently, as I reminisce on the memories of Christmas’ past and ponder what the future holds.
As it is with many families, ours is in the midst of a changing of the guard if you will. Over the past several years my wife and I have lost all of our parents except one, my mother, and for the first time in my memory my mom won’t be spending Christmas at home this year. Frankly, it’s pulled at my heartstrings as I think about it. But, it’s a painful reminder that life is to be lived in the moment as tomorrow isn’t promised, and when given the opportunity one should spend time with our elders because when it’s all said and done, memories are what’s left to carry us forward.
I remember going to my grandmother’s home on Christmas Eve, opening presents, sharing laughs and sitting in the living room watching old Christmas movies as the adults played cards. That tradition carried on as we children got older and it became my mom’s tradition. The last few years as age has caught up to her, we’ve struggled as a family to find where that “next place” would be, only to find that it’s become more difficult to make that happen. This Christmas Eve and Christmas Season will be different and we’ve come to accept it…kind of.
You see, I still long for that one gift we seem to have so little of…time. I want more than anything to spend more time with my loved ones, particularly my mother. But, I realize that in her case those days are fewer in number and each one precious. I long to spend more time with my wife and make the time we have together the best it can be, because after all she’s walked this journey with me and deserves nothing less than my best. Of course, that would require me to unhook from my devices and my work. (Perhaps a great New Year’s resolution?) I long to spend more time with my grandkids, who if you know anything at all about me, are simply the heartbeat of my life. I melt like chocolate in a warm hand when they are near. With them I see the legacy that I will leave and that has been left by those before us. They’ll carry the torch of our traditions, and their new traditions, long after I’m gone. I long to give more of what time I have to things that will matter and make a difference, particularly with those who need the presence of a person who cares more than something of material value. (Another possible New Year’s resolution, maybe?) I long for peace, harmony, and a world where we see each other as brothers and sisters, but perhaps I’m asking too much today in a world that seems to be more polarized than ever. But, it doesn’t hurt to continue to seek to find good in one another does it? And while I have others, space just doesn’t allow for me to ramble on.
I’m sure that many of you are like me and could come up with your own list of longings this Christmas season. Whatever those may be, I hope that you can carve out the time to see them through. I’m positive of one thing, you won’t regret it. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
